Florence the sixth - Pisa

I caught the train to Pisa today, and spent the latter part of the journey having moderate to severe palpitations because I realised that I'd neglected to validate my ticket and wondering if Italian train attendants are as alarming as Italian art gallery attendants. But my luck held firm and there was no ticket check, so now I have a free ticket to Pisa, if anyone's interested.

Pisa itself is alright, kind of like Sylvia Park if Sylvia Park had been founded in 1064, i.e. lots of shops. But the Piazza del Duomo, to which the tourists flock - it's like whoa.

Woo! Reassurance that I got off the train at the correct station.

This is everything on the site - the low building far left is the Camposanto, the round building is the baptistery, the cathedral is in the middle and then a photobomb from the tower in the back. I've managed to make the tower look straight and everything else tilted. I'm reminded of their 1970s Chamber of Commerce campaign: Pisa - Making Your Crooked Posture Work For You.

The tower and the cathedral. I didn't go up because they only allow 30 people at a time and I didn't know how long I'd have to wait and sometimes I'm not too good with uneven ground. Hell, sometimes I'm not too good with even ground.

When you get over the leaning you realise it's an extremely lovely building.

Front of the cathedral.

Inside the cathedral. This picture in no way gives a sense of how awesome it is.

This reminds me of a joke, the punchline of which is "Jesus, I can see your house from up here."

In the baptistery now. This is the view down from the gallery level. Incidentally, why are there separate baptisteries? Why can't they just baptise in the church? Is the squalling of a baby too much to deal with when echoed throughout a massive cathedral?

Oh, this is me trying to be arty and photograph the tower and the cathedral from an upper window of the baptistery. 

I accidentally saved the best for last. This is the Camposanto. It's a cemetery, with the people buried inside the rectangular building that surrounds a lovely lawn.

I have travelled through a lot of ugly urban areas today and it's just strange that the dead get things like this and the living are crammed into imposing featureless apartment blocks. (Oh no, I've broken the unspoken rule of Italy and talked about the yucky parts! Here come the carabinieri!)

Pisa's Funniest Home Frescoes pt 1. I like how you can't tell if he's falling or just being dangled by his ankles.

Pisa's Funniest Home Frescoes pt 2. Bird go splat in 3...2...1...

God's trophy cabinet. Eat your heart out, Sue Sylvester.

Yes weird dead-eyed primitive gargoyle thingy, I'm shocked that it's the answer to life, the universe and everything as well.

Whatever else this guy was, I'd say "super pimp deluxe" was somewhere on his resume.

How awkward that he died while attending a costume party and they had to immortalise him with a fake beard.

Medieval Wheel of Fortune. The wheel is just painted on and doesn't spin because you're all going to hell.

Oh, there's Waldo!

Arr, me hearties! This could well be the grave of a pirate, because Pisa used to be on the coast until the harbour silted up and it became an inland town.

On the way home I did remember to validate my ticket and my ticket did get checked, so my awesomeness rages on.

Florence the fifth

This what the weather widget looks like at the moment. It's an accurate assessment.

Not a lot to tell about today. It being a Monday, and the first Monday of the month, and the day after a public holiday, a lot of things were closed, but I was happy enough to meander and potter about and concoct a rather good lunch of broccoli tagliatelle.

Sigh. Another church. For a change I'd like to see a nice Satanarium. I really wanted to see the inside of this because I believe it to be amazing, but alas, shut up tight.

Another giant gate.

It's all, apparently, part of the old city walls, made to keep out enemies and giants and dead Jews (there was a Jewish cemetery back up the road with a sign explaining it was placed there because Jews couldn't be buried within the city walls - real classy, guys).

...and bicycles. This one died waiting for its owner to come back.

Impending doom.

Impendinger doom. I was lingering because I thought it would be exciting to be caught out in a storm, but mostly it was just wet (from the waist down at least - my umbrella proved its worth with steadfast right-way-outedness). There was some decent thunder, but nothing bone shaking.

Florence the fourth

To tell the truth, I spent most of the day on the couch, relaxing the last vestiges of my cold into extinction. In my defence, today was 1 May, the equivalent of our Labour Day, and I decided to import a little of my own holiday tradition of doing nothing laborious at all. I did get out eventually though, to tour the bridges of Madison County of Florence. So now I have a billion pictures of bridges and on bridges and off bridges and I can't remember which is what.

My cunning plan of up and across and down and across.

Since this is the first picture I'm guessing this is Ponte Amerigo Vespucci. He may not have discovered America, but I'm pretty sure he discovered this bridge.

This is what passes for a beach in Florence - it's a huge cement break that, uh... (little help, river nerds?), but I guess when the water's low enough Florentines use it as the seaside.

This is the other end of it. It's on an angle across the river, so maybe it's there to direct water away from the areas most prone to flooding.

View back along. All the street lights along the riverside are covered with coloured plastic, I guess with the artistic intention of making people's eyes go woogy.

Shriveledy old balloons.

I finally saw some interesting wildlife! I'm not at all sure what it is though. Beaver? Otter? Large rat?

Woo! Adventure tourism!

This one has statues at either end, so it must be Ponte Santa Trinita.

The insanely cantilevered jewellery shops on Ponte Vecchio.

The Uffizi from over the river. There's a long lovely courtyard between the two wings of the gallery, but alas, as has been my lot in life on this trip, it's filled with scaffolding and a crane.

But all of that was just taking the long way around to get to Santa Croce, inside which are buried Michelangelo, Galileo and Machiavelli. Total makings of a zombie supergroup.

And on my way back I came across a flag-tossing competition in Piazza della Signoria. At least, I assume that's what it was - I got there too late to see any actual tossing, but just in time for the prize giving. Never mind, at least I saw some men in tights.

Florence the third

Argh, flashmob! Save me!

So the good news is that I can still speak English. I met some fellow colonials at the laundromat and chat ensued. It went "Are you American?" "No, Canadian. Are you Australian?" "No, from New Zealand." Then we all high-fived each other to celebrate our great good luck. They are doing Italy in the reverse order to me so we had much to talk aboot (literally aboot).

The cold I've had for the past few days has reached the gooey all-in-my-head stage, but I cured myself with the beer of Danish kings and sallied forth to regions over the river (side note: trying to navigate the historic centre of Florence, which is closed to cars but not really, with a beer buzz: not recommended).

Markets of St Souvenir.

Piazza della Repubblica.

Various shots of the Florence Cathedral. I love that the facade is all quirkety - it's pre-the smooth uniformness of the Renaissance.

Sometimes you turn your head and see a street vendor selling boxer shorts with David's junk printed on the crotch. Sometimes you see something worth seeing.

"Fancy a carriage ride?" "Neigh."

A little cross.

From the terrace of the Uffizi gallery. 'Tis a lovely night in Florence. The Uffizi itself (no photography, or scary gallery attendants will yell at you, yes you, Mr Strutting Korean), highly impressive. I looked at rich, voluptuous, idealised paintings until I came over all lightheaded and kind of started to wish for a Picasso to poke me in the nose or a Dali to melt my eyeballs. My favourite was Il Sodoma's St Sebastian, who has a freakin' arrow through his neck and an expression on his face that says "Pfft. I'll walk it off." (Probably a misinterpretation.)